Plant red flags
Twenty warning signs to check in the shop, before the till — the five-minute skill that saves you hundreds and keeps spider mites off the shelf you already love.
- · 19-page PDF
- · Print-at-home
- · Personal licence
€15
Field guide · PDF
The dark room list
What actually survives a north-facing room — the honest buy list for the flat with one sad window.
€15incl. VAT
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Prefer the lot? The pothos person's pack for €35 — save €10.
No plant grows in darkness. This is the honest buy list for the EU's dark-flat majority: 18 plants that *survive* a north-facing room gracefully and cheaply, sorted into three gloom tiers and scored by how slowly they resent it. Includes a midday shadow test you run with your own hand, the survival economics of a plant that just holds still, and the pretenders sold as "low light" that quietly sulk to death.
- · 18-page PDF
- · Print-at-home
- · Personal licence
What's inside
- The honesty contract
- The midday shadow test
- The three gloom tiers
- The dark room tour
- The survival economics
- The November problem
- The grow-light question
- The certificate of realistic expectations
Who's behind this
I'm not a botanist, and I don't have 150 plants — I keep a windowsill's worth, and I've killed a few learning how (a Calathea in eleven days is how this whole thing started). When something goes wrong I go down the rabbit hole: the studies, the extension-horticulture pages, the 2am forum threads, and every horror story plant people send in on @leafjournal on TikTok. These guides are that mix — hands-on experience checked against the research, cleaned up and told straight. No lab, no sponsorships, no “trust me.” Just what actually keeps a plant alive, so yours isn't the one that learns it the hard way.
Best value
The pothos person's pack
Easy trailing green for the darker corners.
The pothos & philodendron file · The dark room list · The string of things file
€35€45
More lists
What's inside →
The cat person's plant list
Thirty plants your cat can audition for dinner — safely.
- · 18-page PDF
- · Print-at-home
- · Personal licence
€15
The divas
The field guide to dramatic plants — why they act like they're dying when they aren't, and the one time per diva when it's real.
- · 18-page PDF
- · Print-at-home
- · Personal licence
€15
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If this guide doesn't help you, I'll refund it — email hello@leafjournal.app within 30 days and it's done.